It’s been just over ten years since I wrote anything in this, in some ways jotting things down, keeping nots, diaries is very much my thing. In other ways it’s not.
What a journey. Many who know me, will know that Rebekah lost her fight to cancer in October 2019.
I cannot easily describe the journey to her death or the one that has unfolded in the last three years.
At the time of her passing I felt ok with the whole, everything had been said, no stone unturned sort of thing….now, I would love to have just a few minutes to feel her presence next to me. I do indeed chat things through with her and I absolutely applaud the way she faced those last months, I applaud it even more with how things have unfolded.
At times, I am overwhelmed, have a head like mashed potato and I’m sick of appeasing things and people..I’ve got better at letting it go - which includes people - but it’s a real challenge.
I feel poked at, badgered to do it the way that others want, staying strong is hard and I can get why people end up going with the flow of others.
Not for me though.
